Confessions of a lesbian

Jes 0 Comments

I am attracted to woman.

That was what my good Thai friend told me when I first got to know her and asked if she has a boyfriend. I was curious so she told me all about her coming out story. She knows that she is physically attracted to girls from the age of 13. She finds them more attractive and got more excited around them.
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She is called a Tomboy in Thailand. This is a different definition than what is known in Singapore, whereby girls who are more boyish in nature like me are called Tomboy. In Singapore, we call them 'Butch' and they want to be men. This is different from 2 females and those are called les-king and les-queen.

From a young age of 13 during the start of puberty, she already knew she was different but only at the age of 16 did she tell her family. It was just another normal day and she just told her parents upfront that she is different, that she likes girls. Her parents walked out of the room after hearing this. She was heart broken but accepted that this is who she is and she can't change it. Luckily for her, her parents approached her after an hour and accepted her true self.

She is lucky, not everyone is so open to this.

She also tried to change herself as she has a good buddy who is in love with her for 13 years till now. She tried to have feelings beyond that of friends for him but was unable to do so. She was so disappointed in herself and cried for some time. It took her some time to accept who she really is and that she can't change it.

How interesting because my homosexual friends in Singapore do not reveal their true self. I find that  in Thailand, people are more open to differences in sexual inclination and gender change. Their society has seen too much of it that there is no stigma now. Even some boys in school wearing uniforms would put on make up and take hormonal pills for a physical change and it's accepted.

However, my lesbian friend find that this is the wrong way to go. In schools, dress code should be followed as teenagers are more impressionistic. Gender change or any intimate actions should not be encouraged during school. Neither should they be encouraged in television programmes. They can dress however they like and hold hands with whoever they want when they are older and more mature.

Gay or not, transexual or not, you can decide when you are of age.

Even though she knows it long ago, she behaved normally and did not act on her impulse. She took time to get to know herself and confirm that this is who she is. She did not actively seek out lesbian partners but became close to straight girls and found that they could click well and communicate at the same level. In her words, "it's more of a companionship ". They cannot get married legally but they would normally hold a party and inform everyone of their union.
"If in fact it is true, and I have asked doctors this, that you are genetically born a homosexual - because that's the nature of the genetic random transmission of genes - you can't help it. So why should we criminalise it?" - Lee Kuan Yew
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Listen to this wise man!
I like her mature behaviour. I am also supportive of being who you are and being with who you like.

Indeed, life is too short to keep caring about what society expects of you but I still hope Singapore can work towards an open mindset like Thailand.

Jes

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