The annual interrogation

Jes 2 Comments

It's going to be Chinese New Year!

Are you excited about it but yet like many others, fearful of the annual routine "有没有男女朋友,几时结婚,几时生孩子? (Are you attached? When are you getting married or having babies?). It's mandatory and incessant and seemed to be able to make most feel weary and irritated.
A ear plug might be a good idea.. (Source: Wikipedia)
Actually, to ask about relationship is kind of a general topic. It seems people don't like to ask about work or health or other stuff... I don't really know exactly where all my relatives are working at and I am sure I am not the only clueless one. The seniors have never asked me what job I am doing but will never fail to quiz me about my relationship status. Actually, that is ok, afterall they don't really know what to ask and there are not many common topics.

But they will willingly nag you that to get married or give birth at a younger age is better. Then carefully remind you that you are not young anymore :( After which, they will go into their own stories on how young they had their children and that it is not easy to conceive when you are ready. To push others about having babies is just weird.. you mean you are encouraging people to have sex without protection? It's such a R21 topic, haha!
The younger the better ma... (Source:
I don't blame them though. In this area, they have been through it and able to share their stories. The only thing common is getting married and giving birth and they are experts in the subject as they have been through it. So when you find your relatives annoying, try to understand that they just want to strike a conversation with you and there are no other topics. If you can think of other topics, you can easily change it to stop the onslaught of interrogating. Some of my introvert cousins will just try to avoid standing near these relatives but it's always good to be sociable.
If no other topics, blame the government for everything happening.. (Source: Wikipedia)
But the thing is, if your friends are the ones asking about these things.. you probably won't be annoyed. Why the difference? My guess is that you can really share with your friends more details but not to your relatives. The relatives never seem to bother asking the reasons why you are not getting married and why no kids yet, just only when you are doing it. Then they start nagging and launch into their stories of how delaying is not recommended. It's more of a monologue than a dialogue, no wonder it became dreary.

Maybe that's only my relatives. They like to talk more than listen and it's kind of amusing to hear their same stories every year. I'd like to think I am different from these relatives but in actuality, I have also started asking those younger than me about their relationships. I hope I come across as more concerned like a friend than just plain naggy!

Definitely a vicious cycle...
So everyone, just get ready your bulletproof vest and await the firing! 祝大家万事如意,洋洋得意, 新年快乐!


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  1. For a change, you tell them your passive income last year is $120K.


    1. Hi CW8888,

      How I wish that is true. But if I really have such great income, also cannot tell them, everyone will come and borrow money from me, haha!

      Thanks for dropping by :)